Mixed signals - they're everywhere.

First she breaks up with you, then she ignores you, and now... now she's throwing off signs? Or is she?

What will an ex girlfriend do and say when she wants to get back together with you? Do you know what body language is giving you the green light? Which signals are telling you to back off? Getting back together is complicated... to be successful, you need to know what these signs are, and exactly what they mean.

Signs She Wants Me Back

Any contact you have with an ex girlfriend has the potential to be both good or bad. Depending on how it goes, and what gets said, you can move closer along the path to reconciliation or suffer major setbacks with the wrong type of contact with your ex.

When your girl initiates that contact, it's almost always good. Signs that your ex girlfriend misses you will invariably lead to a phone call, text message, or a face-to-face meetup between you and your ex. It's because she's missing you that this type of contact happens. And it usually happens because you did the right thing: you went no contact with your ex girlfriend after she broke things off with you.

If you're chasing her however, that's always bad. You shouldn't be the one to make first contact after the breakup, and no matter how much you love her, you'll have to let go of your ex for a while if you want any chance of getting back together again. The whole "if you love something, set it free" thing applies here.

An ex will always be wary of contact with you when she knows you want her back. The more you chase her? The faster she runs. Things can quickly go from bad to worse, as you look more and more desperate to get her back. She'll begin shunning any sort of connection to you after that, especially if she feels pressured by you, or even harassed.

That said, there are definitely some signs you can look for to tell when your ex is getting interested in you again. Here's what they look like, as well as what you should do when you notice them:

Your Ex Starts Hanging Out in Your Circle of Friends

A girl who dumped you and wants nothing more to do with you is going to pretty much avoid you at all costs. She knows that any contact or communication between you can be misconstrued, and she doesn't want to lead you on or give you false hope.

This is why, when she starts hanging out with your friends? Your ex girlfriend is certainly sending out some interesting signals. She could be doing this to get closer to you again, or even to spy on your activities. Make sure your buddies don't get her too much information; even if you're not seeing other girls or going out on dates, you still want your ex to worry about this type of thing. Getting her back is all about making yourself desirable again, and as human beings, we always seem to want what we can't have.

Your Ex Girlfriend Calls for her 'Stuff' Back

If you just broke up, as in yesterday or the day before, this phone call might not mean so much. It's possible she's looking to sever ties with you, and she's getting everything she owns out of your place so that she doesn't have to deal with you anymore.

But if this call comes a week or more later? It's a good sign your ex might be making up an excuse to see you. The value of the item she's trying to get back from you is also important. If your ex is showing up to pick up her TV or laptop computer, that's not so much of a signal. But if she's coming by because she forgot a phone charger or some lame DVD movie? That's a clue she's not coming by just for that one, tiny thing.

Your Ex Girlfriend is Flirting With You Again

Do you go to school with your ex? See her at work, or share the same circle of friends? This situation can be difficult, obviously, but it's also a good vantage point to judge how she treats you.

In this kind of scenario you want to limit contact with your ex to a simple 'hello' or friendly smile. Anything else should be instigated by her. Watch for signs that your exgirfriend comes around you a lot, spends extra time near you, or even starts flirting with you again. If she's always happy around you, looks her best, or touches your arm when she talks to you? She's showing obvious signs of interest. These aren't things an exgirlfriend would do when she doesn't want anything to do with you anymore.

She's Always at Places She Knows You'll Be

You dated, and you know each other. You're familiar with her habits, and she knows yours. So if your ex is showing up at all the same places you usually frequent? It's because she wants to run into you.

Again, a girl who is not interested will avoid her ex boyfriend as much as possible. The fact that she keeps coming around and making herself visible is a sign that she's at least still curious about where you are and what you're doing. And probably, about who you're doing it with.

Your Ex Hasn't Unfriended You on Facebook

There are lines of communication that stay open even after breaking up, and Facebook or Instagram are two big ones. Losing someone usually means losing that person as a friend or follower, so when your girlfriend still hasn't unfriended you? It's because she's still interested enough that she's using social media to keep tabs on you.

How To Get Her Back

Now don't take this as a 'great' sign or anything like that. It could even mean very little. But the good thing here is that the channels are still open. You can control what your exgirlfriend sees (or doesn't see) on your social media page, which is why you need to be very careful about what you put up there.

Don't go for pity. Don't vomit lame 'breakup' song lyrics all over your page, thinking it'll send some deep, meaningful message to her. Do those things, and your ex is going to laugh at you. You'll look weak and desperate and very much like a jilted, rejected ex.

Your Ex Girlfriend Drunk Dials You

Ah, this is a good one. Alcohol is the great equalizer; it destroys inhibitions and allows people to act on their baser thoughts and instincts. So when your ex dials you up at night, all drunk and philosophical? It's because she's thinking a lot about you, even when she's sober too.

Your best bet here is to be supportive and let her talk. Don't push for information, and don't talk about the breakup (unless she brings it up). Whatever you do, don't place blame. Don't be a sarcastic asshole on the phone, because your drunk girlfriend is certainly going to hang up on you.

Now's not the time to hash out problems. It's the time to listen to what she's saying, because there's a good chance she'll let slip hints about why she really broke things off. When a girl breaks up with you, she doesn't always say what caused the breakup. But there are things you can do to find out what those exact reasons were.

Your Ex Wants to Have Lunch or Meet With You

One of the final steps along the path to wanting you back will be when an exgirlfriend asks to physically meet with you. Lunch, dinner, coffee, a movie - it really doesn't matter what you do, the important thing is she's looking to redevelop some of the closeness you had when the two of you were dating.

When you do meet up with an ex, be sure to go slow. Don't seem overeager, and don't rush to conclusions. Try to let her do most of the talking, but also try to fill in the awkward pauses. Make her comfortable. Make her laugh. And when you leave? Make sure you leave her wanting more.

Definitely pay attention to her body language while you meet up with her. Remember, your ex will probably still be guarded. How she reacts to you physically can be even more telling than some of the things she might say.

What You Can Do To Make Your Ex Show These Signs

If you still don't have contact with your exgirlfriend, there are ways you can make her start showing these signs. Select reconnection techniques can influence how she sees you, turning her feelings around and re-creating the atmosphere you both felt when you first started dating each other.

First, learn all the steps found here. Every one of them is crucial to changing the way your exgirlfriend currently views your past (and future) relationship.

Remember: no matter what happened to break you up, there's always a way back. Whether you're willing to walk a step-by-step path to reconciliation - or try throwing the dice and hoping for the best - you've only got a single window of opportunity, so be sure to make the best of it.

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